Friday, April 23, 2010

the current state of girls

as a junior high school teacher, I consider myself an insider into the minds of adolescent girls. well, not really an insider....just someone who spends insane amounts of time eavesdropping on conversations (and stopping the conversations) on boys, shopping, and other girls. I'm someone who picks up notes and scans it for drug use and sex and then tosses it. I used to not read notes, because I just didn't want to know. Now, I feel like if I don't know and don't do something, then I'm letting them down. which is dumb, I know. I've had girls come to me in tears over all kinds of things. sex. abuse. sexual abuse. It is awkward. It is uncomfortable. It is sad. It makes you mad. It is a little too weird for me. I think back to when I was thirteen and I was not this knowledable, yet ignorant.
Okay, so I'm going to school you on pre-teen girls. They're not like they used to be. When I was growing up, promiscuity was not the norm. In fact, most of my friends were not sexually active in high school, let alone junior high (I think I knew two girls who did in junior high). My parents used scare tactics to ensure that I would not have sex. And while I do not promote scare tactics, they actually worked. My dad was quick to point out that the thoughts expressed by rappers in their songs were actually true. The saddest part is that most of the girls don't respect themselves or their body. The issue isn't even them having sex, but with whom and how many. I just feel as though our generation of girls has this high level of disconnect. I think this entire generation does. There isn't really even a desire for a loving relationship.
Don't even get me started on Pregnancy and STDs. These girls are so uneducated and miseducated. I am all for sex ed. in schools. It's fine for the basics. Let's be honest those kids don't take those videos seriously. They're cheesy and gross. The kids are laughing the entire time. The real talks need to happen at home. Parents need to not only educate their kids on the inner workings of the body, contraceptives, etc. They also need to tell their children to respect their bodies. I don't think this conversation happens enough. I think our kids feel as though they want to give away their bodies, rather than preserve it. Kids are curious about sex and if parents don't talk to them, they are going to get wrong information. I'm not saying they won't have sex, but maybe, just maybe they'll enter healthy, monogamous sexual relationships later in life, rather than fumbling around with three or four guys at once at a young age. I also think a frank discussion needs to be had by all about what happens if a child (because 16 is a child no matter if you're a mom or not) get pregnant. I think many families don't talk to their kids about what happens if one chooses to raise the baby, give it up for adoption or have an abortion. They need to know what it looks like in all scenarios, how their religion and culture feels about it, and finally how the parents feel about it. The only exposure to pregnancy and teen parenthood they have is 16 & Pregnant on MTV. Let's be honest: the girls are spoiled brats who have it SOOOO easy! It's not accurate and I feel it actually encourages teen pregnancy or makes it seem okay.
Lastly, if you want to gain insight into the minds of teenage girls. I highly recommend two movies. The Babysitters and Towelhead. Both will make you extremely uncomfortable. But this is pretty much how it is. curious and detached basically sums up my report on the current state of girls. they are curious and they are detached.

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